feeling very raw and down after 10 retreat

thumbnail
b man, modified 11 Years ago at 4/22/13 11:53 AM
Created 11 Years ago at 4/22/13 11:53 AM

feeling very raw and down after 10 retreat

Posts: 199 Join Date: 11/25/11 Recent Posts
Hi guys,

I just came back today from my second 10 day vipassana retreat and am really struggling to process everything and feeling very down / fragile / sad - which is a complete contrast from the highs of yesterday and this morning.

Im hoping a good nights sleep will sort it out but it made me wonder if you guys have any advice in general for after finishing some big retreats. I have been trying not to think about it until after the retreat ended but I also have some decisions to make regarding what to do next in my life and that might involve putting some stuff in storage and going travelling for a while or something that involves taking a break from work for a while,

any advice appreciated,

cheers,

bman
thumbnail
fivebells , modified 11 Years ago at 4/22/13 12:27 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 4/22/13 12:27 PM

RE: feeling very raw and down after 10 retreat

Posts: 563 Join Date: 2/25/11 Recent Posts
Hi, b_man. You were probably warned at the end of the retreat that you should not make any big decisions for a few days afterward. This is good advice.

For the sadness/fragility, try doing metta practice and steer clear of insight for a while. Use the metta practice to train your mind to attend to the positive/pleasurable aspects of the current moment of experience. Go back to insight practice when you're feeling surer again. The good news is that the sadness/fragility was probably always there, but you broke down some of the defense mechanisms which kept it out of awareness. Now you have the skills and insight to address it directly if you wish, which will lead to a much less conflicted life. Metta practice is the way to do this.
thumbnail
b man, modified 11 Years ago at 4/22/13 1:08 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 4/22/13 1:08 PM

RE: feeling very raw and down after 10 retreat

Posts: 199 Join Date: 11/25/11 Recent Posts
thanks man - thats good practical advice - much appreciated emoticon
thumbnail
bernd the broter, modified 11 Years ago at 4/23/13 1:51 AM
Created 11 Years ago at 4/23/13 1:51 AM

RE: feeling very raw and down after 10 retreat

Posts: 376 Join Date: 6/13/12 Recent Posts
b man:

I just came back today from my second 10 day vipassana retreat and am really struggling to process everything and feeling very down / fragile / sad - which is a complete contrast from the highs of yesterday and this morning.


Hi,
after my last 10-day retreat (noting) I left in very high equanimity with very high concentration. I had headaches, much sadness and was generally vulnerable to anything. The teacher had warned me before leaving that this would happen as a side-effect of high concentration. He told me that I'm much more sensitive to everything so normal life would likely feel as total overkill.

He advised me to just note whatever was there. I found his advice helpful - sometimes I would feel very vulnerable and incapable of dealing with reality, but then noting the feelings and other things made me more stable.
This Good Self, modified 11 Years ago at 4/23/13 9:41 PM
Created 11 Years ago at 4/23/13 9:41 PM

RE: feeling very raw and down after 10 retreat

Posts: 946 Join Date: 3/9/10 Recent Posts
bman,

If you want to feel good:

1. do things that make you feel good (eg. travel)
2. avoid doing things that make you feel bad (eg. vipassana)
3. think thoughts that make you feel good, and...
4. avoid thinking thoughts that make you feel bad.

It's amazing how simple life is when you stop hurting yourself.

At some point, vipassana retreats might feel good. Only then do it. Not now. Now they make you feel bad.

Breadcrumb