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Report: Cutting and Weeding [Florian Weps] [MIGRATE]

Report: Cutting and Weeding [Florian Weps]


Florian Weps - 2014-05-02 10:08:43 - Report: Cutting and Weeding

Time for another report.

I think the previous instalment was Dark Kamma Results, which also contains links to older reports, in case anyone wants to read those.

After the events described in that post, my practice turned mainly devotional.  I took up mentally repeating a mantra, and have continued with this practice up to the present.

In formal sitting practice, I visualize the syllables (in our normal, latin writing). I sometimes visualize the Bodhisattva associated with the mantra. As with any concentration-heavy practice, weird powers-y stuff occurs at the appropriate sections of the cycles, mainly in the form of dreams and coincidences which seem significant.

Insight-wise, this practice really trains the surrender non-muscles, letting go, shedding, relaxing, softening (which makes the up-rooting of the dark tendencies a little less painful than it would otherwise be, I think).  I noticed a close interrelationship between procrastinating tendencies and addictive (for lack of a better word) ones.

We moved home, to get a radical change of scenery. This has been refreshing and was really long overdue. New job, too (same field, but smaller company).

I recently made another change in my diet, removing animal products entirely after having been on an ovo-lacto vegetarian diet for the past ten years. Back then, the change in eating habits fuelled my practice; I'm curious if a similar effect will happen now.

I recently re-read an old spiritual book that re-surfaced during our move. I read it last as an adolescent. Reading it now, I think the author, a Christian apologist from the second half of the last century still popular today, was in fact enlightened to a large degree, in the DhO sense. Consequently, he wrote with a certain force of authority, which may contribute to his continued popularity. I'm quite certain that most of his readers are getting something entirely different out of his work than I did on re-reading it, though. Funny thought, how I agree with fundamentalist Christians on the merit of his writings for reasons they would probably not share emoticon But then, that goes for many New Testament passages as well.

So that's it, mainly. Weeding and cutting kilesas. Mentally repeating a devotional chant. Formal sits daily, but without the urge to power the cycles.  If someone told me seven years ago that this was going to be my practice at this point, I would not have believed it, as I was very much into the detailed maps and stages back then.  But this is where it led, for me.

Cheers,
Florian

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Adam Dietrich Ringle - 2014-05-02 14:46:20 - RE: Report: Cutting and Weeding

For me the cycles show up in unpredictable ways. I was just reading your post and half puzzled, half scoffing at your descriptions, thinking to myself that I was past all of that now, when low and behold a cycle showed up! emoticon

Anyway, I really don't like the feeling of meaningless that can present itself during a mental fixation (what I think of as a cycle). What helped me break it was looking into the idea of "What am "I" feeding on right now?" Suddenly the meaninglessness became pleasant, and soon seemed to be an attachment, so I just changed focus.

So, all in all, volition in and off itself is a dead end. So is consumption. So I suppose that one has to balance the two.


As for weeding and cutting, I think for me what works best right now is keeping the above in check. Would automatic and seamless regulation be a pipe dream?