Why does focusing on something cause me stress?

Gerry V, modified 7 Years ago at 9/12/16 7:24 PM
Created 7 Years ago at 9/12/16 7:24 PM

Why does focusing on something cause me stress?

Posts: 131 Join Date: 3/19/14 Recent Posts
My best guess is that I'm still in the Dark Night and I've started to meditate a lot more recently. I notice, and have noticed throughout the years that it seems to be stressful to focus on something. What I mean by that is for example, when I focus on the breath, if I focus on that during concentration practice, my body stats throwing up all kinds of stressful sensations like heat, pain, pressure. If I focus on those, they obviously get worse. One thing that does help though is if just sort of peripheralize things, sort of ignore them. Still aware on the periphery that they're there but not focusing on them. When I do this long enough, usually a few minutes, the shitty feelings start to die down. This leads me to a way more equanimous experience and to what I think is Equanimity where things quiet down and my sense of awareness gets wider.

My goal is obviously stream entry, but I'm wondering, is this normal during the Dark Night, to be averse to direct focus? My intuition is saying it's normal, but reading up on how you should note things until they go away makes me doubt what I'm doing, even though I feel worse doing noting in general. I notice that when I note and focus on things, my life feels more stressful. When I do my letting go technique, my life is less stressful and tense. Would doing what I do lead to Stream Entry eventually? My thought is that letting things go this way maes things die down moe and more. Let go (let things be till they stop coming) of enough things for enough time and this leads to stream entry. I'm not sure about this, this is just my rationale.

Do you think this is a good idea or are there any alternatives I can try? I'd really appeciate some input, I've just about had it with the Dark Night.
Simon Liu, modified 7 Years ago at 9/12/16 8:13 PM
Created 7 Years ago at 9/12/16 8:13 PM

RE: Why does focusing on something cause me stress?

Posts: 83 Join Date: 8/23/16 Recent Posts
Because I am inflexible, I sit on the floor to develop equanimity. 45 min into the meditation I can feel the hardness of my hip bone pressed against the text book beneath the thin pillow. I put my mind directly into the center of the discomforying sensation, it goes away for sometime. 

Now, I have been investigating the nature of wandering thoughts. I relax and stay in present moment and be with the situation. Soon, a discomforting sensation will arise. For non-meditators, it would trigger them into wandering thoughts. It will immediately give pleasant feeling. It happens so fast that they dont even realize that there was arising unpleasant sensations. I have experimented this and found this to be the case.

If I stay with the unpleasant sensations, not let mind go into thoughts, I feel the unpleasant sensation growing stronger. For me, the practice of dhamma is to get to know the full nature of suffeting, so I stay with the unpleasant feeling. I keep practicing this.

You can attain stream entry top down and bottom up. I do this. I meditate which is bottom up and I practice dhamma which is top down. Instead of just letting meditation do the work, I also practice facing aversion and cutting off craving. I dont know wwhere I am at, but I do know that concentration meditation has helped me see craving and aversion energy arising, and reflecting on dhamma has helped me cut off craving that would take years or decades if I rely on meditation and will power.

Sometimes, practicing dhamma without meditation can lead to stream entry as well, but much faster if one does both at the same time. 

I have felt heat, pressure, and pain during meditation. Mostly, I feel the discomfort of propping my back straight and sitting pain in the last 15 min. If concentration has been good, then it goes by without much discomforts. 

I recommend that you sit on the chair for every 3rd or 4th sitting session, so that you can face the aversion without the aversion get the best of you. I do this so that I can get a good sitting session on the chair and still fighting sitting discomforts.
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Noah D, modified 7 Years ago at 9/12/16 9:33 PM
Created 7 Years ago at 9/12/16 9:33 PM

RE: Why does focusing on something cause me stress?

Posts: 1211 Join Date: 9/1/16 Recent Posts
I think of two, divergent approaches:

1) note like hell, power through the dukkha nanas

2) learn to gladden the mind to remedy this tension 

Follow your gut
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Dream Walker, modified 7 Years ago at 9/12/16 11:04 PM
Created 7 Years ago at 9/12/16 10:59 PM

RE: Why does focusing on something cause me stress?

Posts: 1657 Join Date: 1/18/12 Recent Posts
Gerry V:
My best guess is that I'm still in the Dark Night and I've started to meditate a lot more recently. I notice, and have noticed throughout the years that it seems to be stressful to focus on something. What I mean by that is for example, when I focus on the breath, if I focus on that during concentration practice, my body stats throwing up all kinds of stressful sensations like heat, pain, pressure. If I focus on those, they obviously get worse.
Have you ever worked with pain? Dig into it with all the focus you can muster and stay on it like a rabid dog. Does it get worse? How worse? Does the intensity change? How? what other stuff comes up? Does your mind scream at you for being so stupid as to willingly investigate the most ponounced sensations that are occuring in this very moment? Good, notice that too and if you need to, make a note of it. I doubt you will need the training wheels of noting to notice these sensations with all your focus, but if not note.
Gerry V:
One thing that does help though is if just sort of peripheralize things, sort of ignore them. Still aware on the periphery that they're there but not focusing on them. When I do this long enough, usually a few minutes, the shitty feelings start to die down. This leads me to a way more equanimous experience and to what I think is Equanimity where things quiet down and my sense of awareness gets wider.
Ignoring sensations? hmmm. and you want to move along? Resist nothing, especially the shitty stuff, if EQ arises, great.
Gerry V:
My goal is obviously stream entry, but I'm wondering, is this normal during the Dark Night, to be averse to direct focus?
Its normal, that's why its not called the "cuddly white pillow night". Read up on the 3C's stage, you may be tripping thru it without realizing it.
Gerry V:
My intuition is saying it's normal, but reading up on how you should note things until they go away
Sometimes shit breaks up and sometimes it stays. Whatever is happening is what's happening, notice THAT and then note if you need the reminder to stay on task....I always used noting to keep on task during the dark night, as I had little else to help me cling to shreds of hope to move along to EQ...
Gerry V:
makes me doubt what I'm doing, even though I feel worse doing noting in general. I notice that when I note and focus on things, my life feels more stressful. When I do my letting go technique, my life is less stressful and tense.
Well, why not mix the two and play a bit? Its not all hardcore and tough it out. Play with practice, enjoy it, screw around mindfully and take notes on what works and what doesn't. Con you create stress and let go of it? back and forth? how slow? how fast? whats the ratio? Is one more "special" than the other? why? can they be blended? Where is calm at? where is stress at? same place? feel into the body, pin this down and have fun investigating.
Gerry V:
Would doing what I do lead to Stream Entry eventually? My thought is that letting things go this way maes things die down moe and more. Let go (let things be till they stop coming) of enough things for enough time and this leads to stream entry. I'm not sure about this, this is just my rationale.
Who knows? But I'd stop repressing the crappy stuff as unworthy of investigation. EVERYTHING is game for noticing, and then noting if needed.
Gerry V:
Do you think this is a good idea or are there any alternatives I can try? I'd really appeciate some input, I've just about had it with the Dark Night.
I only ever had luck powering thru but I'm extremly sticky with the miserability of the dark night and sometimes do things that might have a more elegant solution, but it worked. I always meditated as much as possible to speed up the dark night stages and this seemed to always accelerate it.
Chatting with others who have been there can help in motivation as they remind you it can be done and others have been thru it too.
Good luck,
~D
Matt, modified 7 Years ago at 9/12/16 11:57 PM
Created 7 Years ago at 9/12/16 11:54 PM

RE: Why does focusing on something cause me stress?

Posts: 316 Join Date: 1/14/14 Recent Posts
Gerry V:
....One thing that does help though is if just sort of peripheralize things, sort of ignore them. Still aware on the periphery that they're there but not focusing on them. When I do this long enough, usually a few minutes, the shitty feelings start to die down. This leads me to a way more equanimous experience and to what I think is Equanimity where things quiet down and my sense of awareness gets wider.

Hi Gerry!

Good to hear from you again.  Whatever the path, ending up in Equanimity sounds good, I wonder what it would be like to try doing a lot of that, see where that takes you.  Maybe this leads you down more of a Jhana path, which is not insight, but it's time well spent on the way to insight.

'Ignoring' reality does not sound good, but maybe there are other ways to look at what you are focusing on and not focusing on that do lead forward.

Have fun with it, find the fun! emoticon
And, Dream Walker has lots of good advice!

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